LIFE comes riddled with fall-downs and get-ups, bumps and bruises, fears and tears. Each road challenges us in every way. Yet, the Holy Spirit woos and guides us through each precarious step in this dark world until we see Jesus. Until then, we only catch glimpses of His glory.
I noted in Exodus that God promised to show Israel His glory. Only a short time after leaving Egypt, they grumbled, “If only we had died by the Lord’s hand in Egypt!… You have brought us out into the desert to starve this entire assembly to death” (Exodus 16:3). God responded, “In the morning you will see the glory of the Lord… then you will know that I am the Lord your God” (Exodus 16:7,12). The next morning “when the dew was gone, thin flakes like frost on the ground appeared on the desert floor” (Exodus 16:14).
I remember grumbling one afternoon in my college library when I felt frustrated, angry, and needed to blow my stack! But, one cannot do that in a college library. So… I took my notebook and pen and began to write… to the Lord. Words flowed out of my heart and onto the paper in a torrent of hurt and desperation. On and on the words streamed until only a trickle coursed to the Throne of Grace. While I wrote, He granted bread from heaven—a glimpse of His glory to quiet my heart with His presence, love, and understanding.
Over the last fifty years, I found that sweet manna available to me over and over again. My relational journey with Jesus lies recorded in stacks of wire-bound notebooks. Yet, far more important, His words flow from the Scriptures into the pages of my prayer/Bible journals and mingle with my thoughts, feelings, desires, needs, and longings. His words change my attitudes, values, focus, and priorities.
It occurred to me one day how a blind person learns to love someone they cannot see. Time spent together familiarizes the sound of their voice, the fragrance of their hair, and the touch of their hands. They learn to “see” with their other senses. Jesus told Thomas, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed” (John 20:29). Moses “persevered because he saw him who is invisible. By faith…” (Hebrews 11:27-28). Yes, we walk by faith through this dark earth place, yet see the invisible One through spiritual senses. He reveals Himself to us through His amazing creation and infallible Word. When we withdraw ourselves from earthly distractions and silence our noisy hearts, we recognize His still small voice.
The conviction and comfort of His Holy Spirit cleanses and empowers us for this journey. The sweet taste of His Word and pure fragrance of His presence permeates our lives “among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing” (2Corinthians 2:15). We know Him because we converse, cry, and laugh together. Sometimes we just sit in silence, aware of each other’s presence. When we stand before Him face-to-face, the familiarity of our relationship will banish all fear.
I recently watched a video of a bride sing a song by Brendan Graham to her bridegroom. I sing it to my heavenly bridegroom:
When I am down, and, oh, my soul, so weary
When troubles come, and my heart burdened be
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence
Until you come and sit awhile with me
You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains
You raise me up to walk on stormy seas
I am strong when I am on your shoulders
You raise me up to more than I can be.
My journey brightens and my load lightens when I position myself to receive His love, wisdom, and counsel. To prayer journal requires no literary ability, only a heart’s desire to communicate joys, sorrows, disappointments, hopes, and dreams with our Savior, Redeemer, and Friend. We glimpse His glory and find nourishment in the manna of His Word when we ask His Holy Spirit to grant understanding and apply His truth to our lives.
Today my Bible journaling from Proverbs 12 reads:
12:1 He who hates correction is stupid. O Lord, please may I not hate correction. Please deliver me from my pride, for with humility comes wisdom (Proverbs 11:2).
12:15 The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice. I often think I’m right. Please humble me to embrace wise counsel and advice.
12:16 A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent man overlooks an insult.” Oh wow! This is me—showing my annoyance at once. Please forgive, cleanse, and change me. Please give me grace to give grace.
12:18 Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. Consequences of my reckless words continue to pierce my heart. Please open my mouth with wisdom and make my tongue the law of kindness (Proverbs 31:26).
12:26 “A righteous man is cautious in friendship.” Lord, I don’t want to use this for an excuse not to reach out to others, but in my neediness, may I be discretionary.
When I prayer/Bible journal, the enemy cannot steal away God’s personally documented words to me. And, like the hymn, when I turn my eyes upon Jesus, look full in His wonderful face, the things of earth grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace. Jesus says, “Behold, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to everyone according to what he has done” (Revelation 22:12). Be encouraged, in the morning we will see the glory of the Lord (Exodus 16:11).
SO MUCH MORE than I asked or imagined? Well… I can’t see any big miracle right now. I came in weakness, wondering if I could sustain another Alcan trip of 5,000 miles—our fourteenth journey over fifteen years across these rugged, wintery miles.


TRAVELING HOME from my fiftieth high school reunion, images, faces, voices, and hugs drift in and out of my consciousness. Over all the years, my gypsy life-style kept me from earlier reunions, so the shock of recognition abruptly interrupted my denial of age.
OUR RELOCATION to Alaska 9/9/‘99 without a job once again tested our faith. We moved into the bottom of our second son’s duplex and looked for work. After three long months, a position opened for my husband at our new church to run the Resource Center. Here we were: near our children, in a good church, with a job, back in ministry, and living in a house instead of a motel. Six weeks later we celebrated God’s grace and goodness at a staff Christmas party, about which I journaled:
I KNOW . . . sounds like a sitcom. Yet, God pursuing us with goodness and mercy all the days of our lives is so much more than characters humorously portrayed on stage.
ONE COLD SPRING our banty hen sat on a clutch of eggs. As they began to hatch, my mother brought them into the house for warmth. My five year old sister sat wide-eyed as she leaned over the hatching chicks, unknowingly imprinting her beautiful little face into their bird brains. As their fluff dried, they instinctively began to move toward that imprint. She moved away. They followed. She moved faster. On they came, peeping their little hearts out. To this day she doesn’t like birds! Under ordinary circumstances, the mother hen keeps close track of her babies and they respond to her call.
TODAY WE LEFT THE SWELTERING HEAT of Tennessee and began our journey back home through Missouri, from where I presently write. This evening, after driving through constant and heavy freeway traffic and dodging a multitude of freight trucks, we relax in little Smithville outside of Kansas City.
WE SUDDENLY find ourselves in Tornado Alley! Just an hour ago we passed through gently rolling hills beneath a warm sun and clear sky. I wondered how to write about the presence of my enemies in this tranquil place where grazing cattle and hay bales dot the hillsides. However, this South Dakota highway took us straight toward an ever darkening horizon until we drove right into a storm. Now lightening flashes and torrents of rain beat against the windshield. We cautiously watch the horizon for any descending funnels. The earlier peaceful, pastoral landscape actually engages a clear and present danger. Seventeen years ago I wrote about a different kind of “tornado alley” in my journal: